I wrote an email to a friend recently, and I believe this would help all of you readers with your social health. My friend wanted me to give him some dating advice, so I dug some up for him and wrote this email (this might look like Christian advice ,and you'd be right about that)\, but Christian advice often works great for non-christians as well. It's your call):
“Hi, Tom. You were asking for some advice on your relationship, right? Well, I took some time to dig something up for you, so I hope you find it useful. If you don’t, well, I’m sorry, but I had deadlines to meet.
“First of all, as a Christian (though I think this should apply to everyone), you should avoid physical relationships. Sexual activities before marriage is something we weren’t supposed to do. Indeed physically-oriented relationships often don’t seem to last very long most of the time. Having sex is a lifelong commitment with your girlfriend that you can never take back, so you have to be prepared to be with them for the rest of your life in marriage if you wish to go to that point.
“It’s not just having actual sex; any other arousing physical contact should be avoided. Often, doing something again and again would not give the same satisfaction after a while, and you would feel compelled to go farther. First, you start touching each other in places. A bit afterword, you may find your hands going underneath each others clothes. Eventually, the clothes come off. Chances are, by the end of it all, you’d find yourself having sex with your girlfriend anyway, so you should do the smart thing and completely avoid sexually arousing physical contact. Also, if you start taking PDA in front of others a little too far, people start thinking what you’re willing to do in private. It cheapens the both of you in the eyes of others, which is also a good reason to avoid it.
“I’m not saying sex is bad, here. In fact, God made it to be enjoyed, just not in a context outside of marriage. It shouldn’t be the focus of your relationship, either. You should like the person for who they are, not for how good they make you feel in bed (or possibly elsewhere). The original point of being in the relationship was to know more about them and their qualities, both good and bad, so that you can decide if you’re willing to make that life-changing choice. Also, don’t let it get in the way of other important things like your relationship with God, your other friends and family, or work. At the same time, don’t let other things get in the way of your relationships too much.
“On another note, don’t have the same intimate relationship with another guy. God intended marriage as a joining between a man and a woman, not two of the same gender. People may argue that they have the right to be in love with people of the same sex, but in the Biblical perspective that’s a big no-no. God would not approve of it. To be fair, he doesn’t approve of a lot of things, but the reasons are all pretty solid.
“Well, there you have it. I’ve got other articles to write, so that’s all I’ve got for now. If you need more, feel free to ask.”
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